i want my future gf to be black. not because i have a fetish, i'm black and want to date someone black because i think we'll connect better. i also want her to be woke. like as left as can be! she also has to be attractive to me and have a good character. i think i'd wanna date someone that would bring out the best in me.

bro im about to go to hs my graduation is on monday!! sorry ive lowk been busy im getting back on the grind though...anyway really sad that i'm leaving and im more sad that i wasnt able to get some of the friends that i fell out with in the 2nd half of the school year to sign my yearbook, i was way too scared to even go up to them...i dont think they like me that much anyway. also, theres this one girl in my school who had distingushed marks on every test it was actually crazy she's so fucking smart i am so proud of her and incredibly envious.

im quite happy i was somewhat productive with my weekend. i just got back from eating a seafood boil! i have a crab cluster in the fridge im gonna eat later. im really sad that the weekend is ending though, i have testing tmmrw. i think ill do well seeing as its not an honors test, but im still kind of nervous. some of the topics in the regular class i havent learned. it always confuses me how we have to do regular + honors tests when we don't learn every part of the regular curriculum. genuinely what do i do when something completely unknown to me shows up on the regular test?? anyway, i should probably go to sleep early. i know i'm not going to though lmfao i will stretch the fuck out of my weekend.

in this one mitsuaya server im in one of the admins pinged @everyone asking what good roblox game reccomendations everyone had. so i decided to be brave and mention ftf. got into a convo with that admin, and then me, them, and like 2 other ppl were talking about harry potter. it was pretty nice and i was even leveling up with my activity :D! then they started talking about something completely unknown to me and i had to step out and suffer the pain of not being able to hop in the conversation. - also another thing, all of these people are either hs seniors or juniors. theyre 16-17. i'm not even a freshman, they're way older than me. and i looked on their bios and intros, they all have my age range in their dni...im so sad because theyre so cool but to respect that person's boundaries, and also because it'd be kind of odd if we were friends, its probably better we don't get too close.

i lowkey have the urge to ghost/block all of my friends just because. its really bad because they are really cool, and this is a very temporary feeling that'll go away once i feel like i've been cared for enough lol...its quite toxic too ill get distant from my friends for nooooo reason and feel better later once they give me attention D: great start to my diary amiright